1 Corinthians 11:2-3 (NIV)
I praise you for remembering me in everything and for holding to the traditions just as I passed them on to you. But I want you to realize that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God.
Paul turns to another question asked by the Corinthians: the roles of men and women. Many people consider this portion of Paul’s letter highly controversial and challenging to interpret. But Paul is writing just as clearly here as in every other part of his letter. The problem with understanding comes from attempting to overlay Paul’s words with the current understanding of feminism and social constructs, which leads immediately to frustration, because Paul’s words don’t fit well with many “modern” ideas. Thus, Paul is immediately branded as a misogynist or worse. But if the words are read as written, without trying to force them into our modern ideas, we can learn some important stuff!
Part of the problem is that people reject the structure of authority and accountability that God established, a structure under which even Jesus places Himself. God the Father is the supreme head over all, even over Jesus. Jesus is the head of mankind, ruling Christian men, whom He established to be the head of the family by God’s own authority (Genesis 3:16.)
This does not mean that a husband is to be a despot or tyrant, any more than God the Father is a tyrant to Jesus, or than Jesus is a tyrant to those men who submit themselves to Him. Instead, as the one who is given not only authority over the family, but responsibility for the welfare and spiritual health of the whole family, the husband is to lead as Jesus himself leads the Church, with self-sacrificial love that puts the needs and best interests of his wife and children far ahead of his own (Ephesians 5:25-33).
The woman, on the other hand is given a different role to play in the kingdom economy. This role is not less valid or less vital than that of the man, but is simply different. Women are never considered less of a person than men are, but the differences between men and women are acknowledged in the roles assigned to them by God. The woman’s primary role in the social structure of the family is to ensure the moral and physical development of the children. She is to love and respect her husband as the one who will be held accountable by God for the overall welfare of the whole family unit.
For thousands of years the nuclear family has been the standard model all around the world. That is because God instituted it clear back at the beginning with the very first couple. That model was followed by the eight people who were saved on the ark, and it spread throughout the whole world after the dispersion from Babel. At times other models have been tried, but all with poor, if not disastrous effect. In the western world today, other models are being pushed forward, with the accusation that the nuclear family is a relic of a patriarchal society structure whose time has passed. But that structure, with his clearly defined roles and structure of responsibility and accountability, did not originate with mere people, but with God Himself.
Father, many today are decrying the ever-growing fault lines and the ever-increasing anarchy and violence in our society, and suspect that the breakdown of the nuclear family is to blame. And, according to Your word, that seems to be where the blame lies. Even in Christian homes, the pursuit of bigger houses, nicer cars, and more stuff, has led to needing multiple incomes. This leaves the moral, physical and spiritual development of the children in the hands of public schools and daycare. In those settings, nurture is spread thin over many children, and, more often than not, humanistic naturalism is the philosophy that is planted in the hearts of the children. Without the structure of responsibility and accountability which You designed to be the heart of the family, too many families, even Christian families, are torn by power struggles and blame casting, even further disrupting the one place in all our society that was designed by You to be a safe haven from the general brokenness of the world around us. The lack of strong, virtuous, and present role models in both the mother and the father, has led to an epidemic of children following the flashy, the loud, the immoral role models that our secularized society offers, and in the process, building emotional walls against the decent, the humble, the spiritual role models that are supposed to inform their lives from the earliest ages. Lord, there doesn’t seem to be a clear pathway back to the wholeness and health of the family, the bedrock of the wholeness and health of our society, unless it begins in Your Church. Help us to listen with open hearts, and receptive minds to Your word, and to structure our whole lives according to the model that You have given us– the model that You designed to work with us as you have made us as both men and women. Amen.